This may be a hard pill to swallow…no one can make us feel anything.

Ever had someone ignore your kindness when you held the door open for them, and suddenly, your blood pressure is through the roof? Or maybe your boss gave you that “Are you serious?” look during a meeting, and you spent the rest of the day convinced you’re one typo away from unemployment.

We’ve all been there, convinced that other people’s actions made us mad, sad, or just plain bananas. But, and This may be a hard pill to swallow…no one can make us feel anything. Not even that jerk who didn’t say, “Thank you.” (Yeah, I know. I don’t like it either.)

This workbook supports you on your healing journey from betrayal trauma. Healing takes time, and you don’t have to go through it alone. I encourage you to work with a counselor for additional support as you navigate this process. This workbook will help you apply the tips from my blog post, Relational Trauma: Healing Tips, to real-life situations. Be gentle with yourself, and remember—every step forward is progress. Feel free to reach out if you have any questions!

So, you’ve been through the wringer—relational trauma, betrayal, addiction, and the emotional equivalent of walking barefoot on broken glass while swallowing fire. Healing isn’t just a straight path; it’s a zigzag of breakthroughs, setbacks, and the occasional “WHAT THE F IS HAPPENING?” moment.

Let’s walk through the key healing tasks—minus the sugarcoating but with a bit of humor to keep us sane. This is the first in the series.

And no, I’m not done with my addiction trigger series, I just wanted to break things up a bit since I’ve been on both side of the addiction coin: the addict and the loved one of an addict.

Let’s continue to talk about triggers. No, not the kind that set off alarm bells—though some days, urges and stress can feel just as explosive. I mean the sneaky dudes that can send you down a rabbit hole of old habits. (Here are the first , second, third and fourth posts in my series about triggers.)  

The good news? You’ve got a secret weapon in your arsenal: self-care. I mean the real, nitty-gritty self-care that helps keep your mind and body in check, so you can stay ahead of your triggers instead of scrambling after they hit.

Addiction—whether it involves substances, behaviors, or habits—can feel like an uphill battle. The urges, the triggers, the relentless pull to give in... it’s overwhelming, like trying to diet while trapped in a bakery. But understanding the mechanics of addiction, specifically recognizing and managing urges, can empower you on the road to recovery. Let’s break it down and explore practical ways to address these challenges. As always, with a touch of humor.

Ever feel like your emotions are a tangled mess, and words just don’t cut it? Maybe you're in recovery, trying to heal, or just having one of those days (anyone else listen to Limp Bizkit back in the day?). If talking about your feelings gives you a knot in your stomach, worry not my Superstars, I’ve got a solution for you: use a color exercise instead.

Your emotions have a whole rainbow of colors of their own, and tapping into them can be a surprisingly powerful way to check in with yourself without overthinking. So, grab some paper, colored pencils (or, whatever markers you can find in your junk drawer), and let’s get expressive.

As you work on establishing healthy boundaries in your relationship, it’s important to reflect on your emotional needs and set limits that protect your mental health. I created this workbook to help partner’s navigate the challenging world of boundaries in your relationship with partner.