Emotional and Outside Triggers in Addiction Recovery

Hello, my Superstars! Today, I’m doing the second installment of my series on triggers. We’ll focus on emotional and outside triggers in addiction recovery. Knowing and understanding our triggers can help us maintain our sobriety and develop successful coping strategies. I’ll also include an in-depth workbook on Monday to help you identify and manage your emotional and outside triggers. You can find part one here.

Last week, we discussed the definition of triggers, which are normally emotional responses caused by a specific stimulus that makes us want to use our DOC or engage in addictive or unhealthy behavior. We encounter emotional and mental triggers internally, and we experience situational and environmental triggers externally.

Yikes, right? It already sounds like a lot to manage. Don’t worry; as you move through your recovery, you’ll identify what your triggers are and either figure out how to eliminate those bad boys or manage them. So, take a deep breath and know you can do this. I went from a hot mess to an emotionally sober, confident, in my own skin-success story, and you can, too.

Emotional and Mental

Emotional triggers can be the toughest manage, at least they were for me. They tend to drive the need to reach for our DOC to numb and avoid pain and feelings. They can pop up in our memory, a situation, or an interaction we’re having.

They are usually linked to our past experiences. Things like unresolved trauma, neglect, deep-seated fears and anxieties, FOO, and other past issues can cause these intense emotions to trigger us. Here are common feelings that may cause us to trigger and want to act in an unhealthy way:

• Shame

• Guilt

• Loneliness

• Anger

• Fear

• Abandonment

If you’ve been following me, you know I’m a fan of Brene Brown. I’d be lying if I said I read every book and listened to every podcast and YouTube video. But on my journey of healing, what I read and listened to changed my perspective on shame, guilt, and vulnerability deeply. If you struggle with any of those things, I recommend you listen. Here’s a quick two-minute preview. 

Outside Triggers

Outside triggers are the ones that happen externally. These include things that can be linked to our past use, like people, situations, places, and objects. They trigger us because they can evoke memories, feelings, and urges to use our DOC and engage in unhealthy behaviors. Almost like the Pavlovian response, it’s become a learned, automatic response. The cool thing is that our brains are malleable and can be retrained. We’re not powerless over our addiction.

While emotional and mental triggers can be challenging to overcome, you may find it hard to manage some of your outside triggers because it may involve making difficult decisions.

You’ll have to decide if there are relationships or people in your life who are toxic. This also means figuring out who enables your addiction and who doesn’t support recovery. You need to surround yourself with a community of people who uplift you, encourage you, and are willing to keep you accountable without judgment but also without blowing smoke up your ass. This will be your Sobriety Circle. It can be made up of people from your support group, meetings, online platforms, trusted allies, accountability partners, sponsors, and whoever you can turn to in moments of crisis and success.

You’ll also need to figure out what places trigger you. The obvious ones will be where you acted out, but it may be more in-depth than that. Work, traffic, and lines at the store may be triggers for you. Don’t worry; that doesn’t mean you’ll have to become a hermit; it means you’ll have to learn recovery tools to add to your toolkit.

Things like the holidays, family gatherings, finances, and even recovery can be triggering. Before you give up entirely, there are ways to navigate through all these things. It’s a matter of understanding that not every moment of every day is going to be jam-packed with triggers. You’ll understand that traffic pissed you off yesterday but not today, but Ralph, for some reason, did. It’s part of the process of navigating and regulating our emotions as we learn what triggers us and as we learn to create and enforce our boundaries. One day at a time is a saying for a reason.

Ways to Identify, Avoid, and Manage Triggers

Get Rid of Reminders

Obviously, you need to get rid of your DOC and paraphernalia. Still, it would help if you also got rid of anything that will remind you of it. I went a wee bit too far and threw out some pictures related to my betrayal trauma and my sexual abuse. In hindsight, I should’ve hidden them in the back of my closet until I was healed.

Tracking

Stay tuned for the workbook to track your triggers. However, you can use a journal or a calendar if you want something more in-depth. This can help you see if there are patterns in your thoughts or situations that are triggering you.

Talk to It

Something that worked for me was talking to my trigger. I know, I know, this may not sound like something you can do at the moment, but if you take a deep breath, pause, and then ask your trigger what it wants from you or what its purpose is, you’re doing a couple of things. You’re breaking the trigger’s momentum and taking away its power. Pretty cool, right? If this sounds too much to you, then you can just ask yourself what you think this emotion is trying to tell you at this specific moment.

Meet It, Greet It, Transform It

You can also try my Meet It, Greet It, and Transform It technique for the emotion to help keep it from popping up again. First, we Meet It by acknowledging the thought or emotion’s presence. This takes awareness. After you’ve acknowledged it, Greet it. Give it a name. Is it fear, insecurity, rejection, loneliness, jealousy? Finally, you’ll Transform It. You’ll do this by changing your mind to something you’re grateful for. Having an attitude of gratitude creates new, positive pathways for our brains to follow. We can change from saying we’re happy the glass is half full to grateful for the cup. We can shift our thinking from saying, “What good is it?” to “What is the good?” When we do this after a negative thought or emotion, it becomes easier to keep them spiraling and prevent them from coming up so often.

Preparation

Sometimes, we know we’re going to be in a situation that may cause us anxiety and tension. Whether it’s work or a family function, we can have an action plan ready to go.

I’m a planner—I always have been. Sometimes, at the moment, we need something quick, so this will help. You can have it ready ahead of time, just like your go-bag.

Counseling

Yep, I’m going to say it again. Counseling is worth it! The money you spent on your DOC can be used on counseling. If possible, find one that specializes in addiction. If you’re not a fan of counseling, try life coaching. That’s what I did, but be warned, a life coach can’t help you past trauma.

Open Mind

Please don’t be like me. I had a closed mind when I started my journey of healing and emotional sobriety. Be willing to try what’s out there. You never know what will work for you. Give it more than one try if it’s a meeting or support group. Sometimes, it takes a few meetings to see if it’s a good fit. If not, try a different one. Same with counseling and life coaches. They’re all different. Find one that clicks with you.

If you’re finding triggers overwhelming, give yourself grace. This is a huge learning curve, but you’ll get through it. Be sure to check out my worksheets for more help with affirmations and self-love. And look out for my workbook on Wednesday!

If you have any questions, please let me know. I answer my emails unless you’re a solicitor.

Sending everyone happy and healthy vibes,

Laura 

If you reach out, please be patient. I’m not a life coach anymore because of my health issues.